How often do you get to dress up and rub elbows with the glitterati of Beverly Hills? If you’re anything like me—basically not at all. My natural habitat is the chill Venice/Marina del Rey/Santa Monica trifecta, where “fancy” means ordering oat milk instead of almond. But for lunch with a friend, we decided to play posh for a day and swan into the Beverly Wilshire like we belonged there.

Enter THE Blvd, where California sunshine meets Mediterranean chic, with a dining room that looks like it was designed for someone who says “darling” without irony. Plush sofas? Check. A glowing onyx bar that screams “I’m expensive, please Instagram me”? Double check. And the people-watching? Pure gold—half the fun is trying to guess who just left their Tesla parked illegally out front.

The food was as extra as the setting (in the best way). We started with the focaccia bread, which was pillowy enough to qualify as a luxury mattress, and the Dungeness Crab Cake—glammed up with pepper marmalade, Sea Buckthorn Gel (basically pineapple and passionfruit’s tart, eccentric cousin), samphire, and lime salsa. A crab cake so dressed up, it could’ve been on Real Housewives.

Then came the Cobb Salad, their signature dish—baby lettuces, grilled chicken, avocado, bacon, feta, tomatoes, radish, and a Green Goddess dressing that probably has its own skincare line. We also tackled The Blvd Burger, a decadent beast made with dry-aged bone marrow, bourbon bacon, onion jam, gouda, heirloom tomato, bibb lettuce, and a “secret sauce” they will not tell you about—because Beverly Hills loves a good secret.

Oh, and the fried chicken sandwich? Imagine Southern comfort food got a glam squad makeover: cabbage, daikon sprouts, and dill ranch strutting down Rodeo Drive.

For dessert, the Banana Gelée with puff pastry, vanilla whipped ganache, and brown butter crumble was basically dessert couture. Sweet, dramatic, unforgettable—like the perfect Beverly Hills cameo.

Yes, it’s pricey. Yes, it’s over the top. And yes, you should absolutely go at least once, just to feel like you’ve made it—even if you UberPool home after.